When I started this blog I thought “Oh yeah, I can definitely do this every week, I mean I’m surrounded by four times the material” But what is really boils to is if I want to do it. And these past weeks I sure enough did not want to do it, nor did I have the energy. I swear every other week since January 2nd, I have been sick. Cold, sinus infection, stomach virus, questionable flu, sore throat, head cold and stomach virus. Like my immune system can’t even recover before I’m sick again. The husband is walking around all cocky “Oh my immune systems must be magnificent because I’ve been fighting colds left and right.”  Bruh, shut up.

I think the during this prolonged sick phase a running theme has been “I don’t like you/I hate you.” But I feeeellllll like the dislike has only been directed towards me.  It all started when Ari wanted to be carried from the car to inside the house one day. Ray told him no and I got out the car and helped Auset out. I told him nicely “Hey buddy, I have a lot to carry to the house, I need you to walk” I gathered all my items, waited for him to get out of the car, followed him into the house and watched him walk over to the couch, spin around and go “I hate you mommy”.  I replied “I’m not even mad bruh, but you’re going to have to go upstairs because that’s rude”.  While he was in timeout I told Akila that him saying I hate you was partly her fault. Because it was. In all her preteen angst she always hates something. I told her that word is now banned from our house. And when Ari came out of timeout I had a talk with him about how it’s ok to be frustrated or disappointed but also how hurtful that word can be and since he’s starting school he shouldn’t use it as it can hurt his future friends’ feelings, blah blah blah all that good parenting shit. We even hugged at the end. Pretty Full House-esque if I don’t say so myself.

Now Auset is watching all of this mind you and a few days later she gets so mad she screams at me “I don’t like you!” Now first I can appreciate the modification I mean for a two-year-old, -not bad. But secondly- come on! Like why am I that unfavorable? I’ve tried to nip it in a butt with her no dice. Timeouts, firm talking to,  Ari even tried to chastise Auset – “Don’t talk to my mom like that!” But no dice.  If Auset doesn’t like you, she doesn’t like you damn it. We’ve been doing this routine for the past few weeks now, she’ll do something crazy, I will tell her to stop or that doesn’t go there, she will scream she doesn’t like me and I will say “ok but you still can’t have/do/say xyz” and she will then scream “I don’t like you” and I will ignore her. One time however she screamed “I don’t like you” and my pettiness kicked in and I said “Well  I don’t like you either”. Well folks, I done fucked up. She looked at me like I said something completely off the wall and ran to Ari and told Ari to tell me to stop and cried and he hugged her and told me to stop.  Wait, what? Everyone is in this house has told me told in one way or another I was on their shit list and when I retort I’m the wicked witch.

This currently has no resolution, even though they give me tons of hugs and kisses, Auset still ‘doesn’t like me’ almost every day and most of the time I just mumble “I don’t like you either” under my breath before I try to be a parent and tell her that’s not nice or appropriate.